Sunday, December 15, 2013

Episode 1.1- Something is Very Wrong

Twelve Sims are due to arrive on this island in the next few hours. One of them knows more than the others. But nightfall today, someone will be dead, and the task will be left to discover the killer or be picked off one by one. Can you spot a murderer in their ranks? 

Brown: "Well, you can't say it is not a pretty island."
Plumtree: "Oh yes, it is. Quite a pretty island."
Brown: "Indeed. But there is something quite peculiar about the whole affair, wouldn't you say?"

Plumtree: "About being invited for a two-week visit to an old friend's mansion on a private island? I fail to see the problem. And, we have the company of 13 other individuals to keep us entertained."
Brown: "13? I thought there were 12."
Plumtree: "You are forgetting Mr. Boddy. I'm sure he will by quite an appropriate host. These are high class people, Miss Brown. I'm sure you will be comfortable, if nothing else."

Brown: "I'm not sure I will be, Mr..."
Plumtree: "Plumtree."
Brown: "Thank you. But yes, these people, I mean, you saw them? They have their frills and highly-held noses and just reek of luxury and privilege and you and I aren't like that."
Plumtree: "Oh course we are like that! Like you weren't born into old money."

Brown: "I wasn't though!"
Plumtree: "Then how did you make the acquaintance of Mr. Boddy?:
Brown: "That is the funny thing. I don't remember. I mean, I recognize the name, something to do with my childhood, I'm sure, but really, I haven't a clue who this man is or what I'm doing here. I just, I guess I was feeling impulsive."
Plumtree: "Well, I'm glad you were. Mr. Boddy has an enormous library. We can sit and read and forget about the world for two weeks."
Brown: "I suppose. And how do you know Mr. Boddy?"

Plumtree: "I believe he donated a great sum of money to Cambridge, where my uncle works. He became quite close to my uncle through that connection."
Brown: "Oh, so you never met him either? I was worried I was the only one."
Plumtree: "To be perfectly honest, I'm not sure my uncle ever met him."
Brown: "You said they were close?
Plumtree: "Oh...did I?"

White: "So there it is! Boddy Manor, in all of it's glory!"

White: "This is where I'm headed! I just need to get as close as possible to the aging Mr. Boddy, slave away for him until I get into his will, and then, I will live a life of luxury!"

White: "And I mean, granted, who knows how long he'll take to croak, and this house isn't exactly what I'd call 'attractive' but hey, it isn't ever day you get to work for a man who is rich enough to own an island of this size and get a vacation thrown into the deal."

White: "Here is the moment of truth. The moment I meet the great Mr. Boddy. The moment I meet the man who will change my life!"

White: "Um, hello?"
????: "Come in, Mrs. White. I've been waiting for you."

White: "Mr. Boddy! How nice to finally meet you!"

Violet: "Hurry up, Reverend Green! That damn blue woman and orange man left ages ago. If we wait much longer, all the good bedrooms will be taken."
Green: "Oh, I'm coming. Goodness woman. Don't you ever take some time to see the world around you?"
Violet: "My comfort for two weeks is at stake! I will have ages with nothing better to do than take my time."

Green: "My dear, your time is precious. You can never tell how much of it you have left. If you spend your whole life rushing onward and never get where you are going, you'll have wasted it."
Violet: "Alright then, Reverend. By that logic, if time is so precious, we shouldn't waste it slowly trudging through the forest. It is mindless."
Green: "I'm not a young man anymore, Madame Violet. Next thing you know, I may have dropped dead and I'm not about to give myself a heart attack over this."

Violet: "That day may be sooner than you think. But fine, I'm going ahead. Suit yourself."

Green: "I will, young lady! And I will use the eyes God gave me to view His works in the world around us! You will run your entire life and always have your eyes open but never really see."

Violet: "Well, at least I'll still be alive."
Green: "What was that?
Violet: "Nothing. See you in a week or whenever you reach the house!"

White: "How nice of you to invite me to be your maid, Mr. Boddy."
????: "Actually, I'm not Mr. Boddy at all."
White: "Oh. Who are you then?"

????: "You may call me The Butler. At least, that is what Mr. Boddy told me to tell you."
White: "So Mr. Boddy is here?"
The Butler: "No. He will arrive this evening."
White: "Oh, I see. But we are to be staffed together. We can called each other by our true names, right?"

The Butler: "Presumably. Then you may call me 'The'."
White: "Wait, just The? What kind of a name is that?
The Butler: "It isn't one."

White: "Why is there a need to be so secretive? I've been perfectly straight forward with who I am."
The Butler: "Well, you'll see how that works out for you."
White: "What?"

White: "Madam, I don't want my name attached to this case. There is nothing wrong with that. Now, head to the kitchen and prep some dinner. We will be eating at 6, and by we, I mean everyone except for you. Also, you haven't a bed due to Mr. Boddy not making the proper plans and having a house of limited size. So, enjoy your stay at Boddy Manor."

White: "Hmph. I'm not sure I like you at all."
The Butler: "Well, that's unfortunate. I do believe the toilet needs scrubbing."
White: "Isn't that the butler's job?"
The Butler: "The Butler does no cleaning of toilets. The Maid will do that work."
White: "Hmph."

Peach: "So, how did you meet Mr. Boddy again?"
Peacock: "Ha! Young man, I did not simply meet Mr. Boddy, I am engaged to him!"

Peach: "Oh. Shame."
Peacock: "That is not a shame. It is very much not a shame."
Peach: "I'm sorry, Mrs. Peacock. I was thinking about one of my experiments. Quite unfortunate that you have someone who will notice when you...nevermind. Your engagement?"

Peacock: "He did it with a letter. The same letter inviting me here, actually. I mean, I don't usually go to strange islands to visit people I don't know, but Mr. Boddy is known for his wealth and success, and with that proposal, I simply had to come."
Peach: "Wait, you haven't even met him...and you are engaged?"
Peacock: "I see nothing wrong with that. It isn't as though he'll last long."
Peach: "Ha. He isn't a young man."

The Butler: "Ah, Mrs. Constance Peacock and Dr. Peach Parfait. Welcome to Boddy Manor."
Peach: "It certainly doesn't look welcoming. You are Mr. Boddy?"
The Butler: "The butler, sir."

Peacock: "Oh, scoot out of our way! Soon, this will be called Peacock Manor, and you will work for me!"
Peach: "Wouldn't it still be Boddy Manor?"
Peacock: "Don't be ridiculous. I haven't changed my name for the past five husbands and I won't make a change at number six."
Peach: "I see. So you have standards."
Peacock: "What about you? Why are you here?"

Peach: "Simply put, I am to be Mr. Boddy's doctor. Also, an excellent opportunity to do some, ahem, medical research."
Peacock: "Oh, excellent! I didn't realize that Boddy was ill!"
Peach: "I didn't either, but a fellow named Roger Wilmington wrote to me with some insight. He said that he had met Mr. Boddy and his illness was not of body, but of the mind."
The Butler: "Insanity. Makes perfect sense. Come along, I will see to it that you have a nice place to wait for the other guests to arrive."

Peacock: "Well, Mr. Boddy certainly needs some redecorating! Not to worry, I'm sure I will take care of that once this becomes my 12th chateau."
Peach: "Twelve? Goodness woman. Where can we stay?"

The Butler: "The lounge. If you need anything, just alert me."

The Butler: "That is..if you can! Muahahahahahahaha!"

Peacock: "What on earth was that?"

Peach: "What was what?"
Peacock: "He's laughing his head off on the other side of the door!"
Peach: "Listen, I don't know what tricks you are playing, but..."

Peacock: "Go in the...what's wrong?"
Peach: "The door..."
Peacock: "What?"

Peach: "The old devil locked us in! Something is very wrong, Mrs. Peacock. This man, this house. We are prisoners!"

Scarlet: "Wow. The fillets in the giant pond are like, moving."
Lemon-Lime: "What?"
Scarlet: "The fillets! Only their heads and shiny bits are still attached. And they are less cooked."

Lemon-Lime: "You are very clever, you know that? Those are called fish."
Scarlet: "Thanks. I think, like, a lot of people have talked to me before. And no one has called me clever. Strange..."
Lemon-Lime: "Oh god, you are an idiot."

Scarlet: "Hey! Hurtful! Unless that's a compliment?"
Lemon-Lime: "It was."
Scarlet: "Thanks then."

Lemon-Lime: "So, what brings a piece of work like you all the way to Boddy Island?"
Scarlet: "I was, um, initiated?"
Lemon-Lime: "Invited?"
Scarlet: "That's it! By a Mr. Broody?"

Lemon-Lime: "Body, my dear. Dang, you are stupid. Had you, um, spoken to him before that?"
Scarlet: "Oh yes! I spoke to him every night before I went to bed."
Lemon-Lime: "What is he like, huh? I'm just hear because he's some guy my parents work with."

Scarlet: "Um, he's very clear. Like, glass, only you can't feel him. Invisible."

Lemon-Lime: "Yeah, you are useless. I can't believe I'm talking to someone so incompetent."
Scarlet: "I was incomplete before you came into my life too!"

Lemon-Lime: "Nice to know how fulfilled you are now. So you can coil over and die and it won't be a problem because you met me and your life is now perfect. Right?"
Scarlet: "Yeah! I'd rather not though."

White: "I cannot believe that Butler guy! Well, he'll see. They'll all see, I'll make him pay, I'll...I'll..."

White: "Oh my god, what is that girl doing wandering the grounds!"

Rosebush: "Well, all I've got to say is that this certainly isn't the best looking house I've ever seen."
Gray: "Well, I mean, it could be worse. But yeah, it is pretty ugly."
Rosebush: "Yes, quite. What are you doing here?"

Gray: "Mr. Boddy wrote to me saying that he was planning on working on a movie and was interested in my talents. Naturally, I couldn't resist the chance to make it big."

Rosebush: "Sorry to tell you, but you'll never have the chance. I mean, you are kind of good-looking, but.."
Gray: "Why not? Why can't I make it? I'm a good enough actor."
Rosebush: "I'm sure you are, but, judging from your clothing choices, you don't have money. And no money will get you nowhere."

Gray: "No talent will get you nowhere. And I'm still rich by most standards."
Rosebush: "Oh please. Dressed in that? You clearly got it from a clearance bin."
Gray: "I..."

Plumtree: "Hello, folks, we were just making our way towards the house. Nice to see you."
Gray: "Hello. You are?"
Plumtree: "I'm Harry Plumtree and this is Erdried Brown. And you?"
Gray: "Eric Gray and Simon Wentworth-Rosebush."

Rosebush: "What is wrong with that woman?"
Plumtree: "She's just...erm...out of her element. Right Miss Brown?"

Brown: "Oh, yes. I'm fine. Something is very wrong, something is wrong but I'm fine. Nay, I'm fantastic. Peachy. I'm going to have a nice two weeks, I am going to enjoy myself. And I'm pleased to meet you all too. I'm Erdried Brown."

Gray: "Plum here just told us that."
Brown: "Oh. I wasn't listening."

Rosebush: "Well, I say it is about time that we headed inside. Wouldn't you agree?"
Plumtree: "Yes. Miss Brown, you are sure that you are alright?"
Erdried: "I'm fine. I'm completely fine."

Mustard: "Hello. They really need to get a boat that can fit more than too. No one wanted to go with me. I'm Mario Mustard, and you are?"
Green: "I'm Reverend Jonathan Green, nice to meet...ah! What is wrong with your skin?"

Mustard: "Mustard. I bathe in the mustard! Mustard, the love of my life, can go into all of my crevices, explore the bits of me that no human eye will ever see."

Green: "You mean you put it...good God, man! That's, that's blasphemy! That's sacrilegious!"
Mustard: "You are in love with God. I am in love with mustard. I see no difference."

Green: "There most certainly is a difference! You cannot compare mustard and He who is all powerful! That is, it is wrong!"
Mustard: "And what if I like to worship mustard?"
Green: "Well, I hope you enjoy the pits of hell."

Mustard: "Likewise. Now, I say we put this behind us and enjoy a nice, slow peaceful walk. What do you say?"

Green: "Finally, something we can agree on. Let us enjoy the nature, for God put it there for us to enjoy."
Mustard: "I'm glad the high mustard seed did."

Green: "If you mention mustard one more time, I'll..."
Mustard: "What?"
Green: "Nothing."

White: "Miss, this is a fine estate! There is no sense in wandering the grounds like a banshee, flailing around a causing a scene!"

Violet: "Uh...I was just standing here!"
White: "A lady should not just stand. Come inside, you wretched girl."
Violet: "I think you are being ridiculous."

White: "And I think you are being fresh! If I had the chance to be invited to a fancy two-week trip without being a servant, you can bet your knickers I'd snatch it up. Here I am, all alone, slaving away, while you waste your time, all alone, standing about! It is interminable!"

Violet: "Oh, you are the maid? That's...nice."
White: "What's that supposed to mean?"
Violet: "Just that you are the most unimportant person here. Easy to...get to know."

White: "Unimportant? Well I never! I'm not the one standing in the mud."
Violet: "There's no..."
White: "COME!"

Violet: "I'm coming, I'm coming!"

The Butler: "Welcome to Boddy Manor."
Plumtree: "Hmm. Nice place."

The Butler: "Indeed it is. I will be your humble servant for the duration of your stay here."

Brown: "Wow... It is lovely! Maybe I'll like it here after all. Maybe everything is right."
The Butler: "Right..."

Gray: "Be sure to tell your host how kind it was for him to invite all of us here."
The Butler: "I'm sure he already knows that."
Gray: "Ah."

Rosebush: "Well, I think it's hideous. Everyone knows that respectable manors have grand halls with tile floors."
The Butler: "No one said this was a respectable manor."
Rosebush: "Clearly."

The Butler: "Allow me to show you all to the Lounge. Some of the other guests have, um, voluntarily retired to it."
Plumtree: "Voluntarily?"
The Butler: "No, I said...Yes."
Brown: "What?"
The Butler: "I said, 'No, I said...' no, nevermind."
Gray: "What?!?"
The Butler: "Nothing."

Peach: "I cannot believe this! I was promised a week of luxury! I did not expect to become a prisoner!"

Peacock: "Who says you can't be a prisoner and live in luxury simultaneously? Ask any of my last five husbands. If they were, you know, alive."

Peach: "Are you not at all concerned that we have no control? We are trapped. Locked in. The butler man was laughing at us outside. He could be a rapist! He could be a murderer!"

Peacock: "Murderer?!? Ha, the only murderer here is...there is no murderer here! He's just a little nutty, that is all. Come on now, relax. Watch a little telly."
Peach: "How can you expect me to just--"

Plumtree: "Hello there."
Peach: "Quick! Get the damn door before he shuts it!"

The Butler: "Ha!"

Brown: "What is going on here?"
Peach: "He just locked us in. We are trapped here."
Brown: "Nice to meet you too."

Rosebush: "The nerve of that man! The lower class needs to learn their place! They can't go about locking us up in our own mansions. It is preposterous."

Peach: "And you, Gray fellow! You have big muscles, you are twice the size of that frail little man. There is no reason you couldn't have taken him out once you realized what he was up to!"
Gray: "Excuse me, I was more than a bit confused about what was going on!"
Peach: "You are an idiot."
Gray: "You got locked in here too!"
Peach: "I had no one to warn me."

Peacock: "Oh my God, shut up already. I wish you'd all just drop dead."
Rosebush: "I know right! Irritating people..."
Peacock: "Hmph."
Rosebush: "Hmph."

Green: "It is quite nice to enjoy nature, isn't it Mr. Mustard?"

Mustard: "Quite. Just look at those lovely mustard trees growing over there!"
Green: "Those are regular trees. Mustard seeds don't even grow on trees."
Mustard: "Mustard seeds do what they please."

Green: "You know, I think I was enjoying this walk more before you joined me."

Mustard: "Fine. Go ahead then. I have a knot in my back anyway."

Green: "Perhaps, if you laid off the mustard and took care of your body, you wouldn't have this problem."

Mustard: "Because you are in such fantastic shape Reverend!"
Green: "Compared to you, yes! You are disgusting! Gluttony is a mortal sin!"

Mustard: "Does hell have mustard? I always pictured it like a giant sandwich."
Green: "Hell has fire! It has the devil and all the evils of the world! And you will know soon enough, regardless."
Mustard: "I think a nice limp sandwich with no mustard is hell enough."

Lemon-Lime: "Hey! Guys! Is this the way to the mansion?"
Green: "Well, I suppose the idea of hell is up to interpretation..."

Lemon-Lime: "Look at me! LOOK AT ME NOW YOU FREAKS! GAH! GAH! GAH!"
Scarlet: "Um, like, look at us?"

Lemon-Lime: "Ha ha ha ha ha ha! You guys are so funny!"
Mustard: "Yeah, I suppose so. That's kind of...reasonable of you."

Scarlet: "I think they have blind ears or something."
Lemon-Lime: "My ears don't see either. You mean deaf, sweetheart?"
Scarlet: "Death! There's no death here!"
Lemon-Lime: "Oh, there's gonna be."

Green: "I'm sorry, misses, didn't see you there."
Scarlet: "See? Blind."
Green: "I am not blind."

Lemon-Lime: "You are an idiot though. You left, literally, ages before me and you and walking so slowly and blocking the path. I just wanted to know if this was the way to the house."
Mustard: "It is."

Lemon-Lime: "It is? Then so long suckers. You can wander around the wilderness, I will be relaxing in Boddy Manor! Ei ei ei ei ei!"

Green: "Okay...So, Mr. Mustard, are you ready to put aside your pagan practices and enter the kingdom of heaven."
Mustard: "I guess..."

Scarlet: "Uh, yeah I'll leave. Laurel! Wait for me!"

Plumtree: "So, let's break the ice. If we are all trapped together we might as well earn more about each other."
Gray: "Well, I'm an aspiring actor. That's about it."
Brown: "I'm a bookish lesbian."

Peacock: "I'm a wealthy widow."
Rosebush: "You know that you have led a lame life when you can sum up your entire personality in two words."
Peacock: "You cannot--"

Peach: "Will you all please SHUT UP!"

White: "Oh how horrible! I cannot believe how much of a brat you are, my dear."
Violet: "Look, I don't even know what I've done wrong."

White: "Oh like you don't know! My pay is substandard anyway..."
Violet: "I really don't know what your problem is."

Lemon-Lime: "Hello folks. Nice to meet you all."
White: "Hello miss, um..."

Lemon-Lime: "I'm just Laurel Lemon-Lime. Drop the miss."
White: "No I will not 'drop the miss'."

Lemon-Lime: "But I'm no miss. Want to know a secret? I can shoot milk out of my nose!"
White: "Oh how disgusting!"
Lemon-Lime: "Milk is white, kind of like you. I guess maids are kind of like tissues, nice to have and disposable."
White: "How DARE you!"

Violet: "And you that I was a brat..."

Scarlet: "She's a little tjaccalaccalottata."
Violet: "What is that?!?"
Scarlet: "I don't even know."

Lemon-Lime: "What do you expect me to be, lady, proper? I ain't proper. I ain't a lot of thing. I am only here because my parents made me come, but I'm going to make a scene and I am going to be a big deal and there ain't nothing you can do about it. Got it?"

White: "Oh, get away from me you disgusting, privileged child! Don't you realize how much I'd love to be in your shoes? No, you don't, and you never will!"
Lemon-Lime: "Won't I?"
White: "No!" 

Violet: "So you are?"
Scarlet: "Uh, Sus...what was I saying?"
Violet: "Your name."
Scarlet: "Susie Scarlet."
Violet: "I'm Viola Violet. Nice to meet you Susie. Nicer than you'll ever know..."

White: "You will regret the day you were ever born, Miss Lemon-Lime!"
Lemon-Lime: "Laurel!"
White: "Mark my words!"

Lemon-Lime: "It looks like that guy is having a minor panic attack."

White: "I'm sure he is. Go check on him and get away from me!"

Violet: "What is wrong, sir?"
The Butler: "Nothing, miss. I just came to a realization."
White: "And what is that?"
The Butler: "Mr. Boddy told me that you all had met him before."
Lemon-Lime: "Get to the point."

Scarlet: "Um, guys? I forget how to use these things on the front of the door."

The Butler: "This is none of your concern. Head into the lounge, please. You will find some other guests, make yourselves comfortable."

Violet: "Alright, I shall."
Scarlet: "Alright, figured it out."

White: "May I go in the lounge too or do I have maidly duties to attend to?"

The Butler: "Oh no, you'll want to be included in this."

Violet: "Well, this is a nice room..."
Lemon-Lime: "Meh..."

Peach: "You idiots! He just locked the door behind you. We are all trapped here!"

*doorbell rings*
The Butler: "Ah, I see our final two guests have arrived. Soon, we may begin. Muahahahahahaha!"

Mustard: "Hello, I'm--"
The Butler: "I know who you are, thank you. We have been waiting for you."

Mustard: "Sorry about that. This fellow decided to have a lengthy chat about the damnation of my soul. It made me quite giddy, I can assure you."

The Butler: "Oh, it makes me quite giddy too, thinking about you being in the pits of hell."
Green: "I get no pleasure from the idea."
The Butler: "You know you do. Hurry into the lounge now, there you go."

Green: "We are here!"
Mustard: "Yup!"

Peach: "I cannot believe this! Twelve people allowed that idiotic man to trap them!"
Green: "We're trapped?!?"

Mustard: "With no mustard? Well, better make ourselves comfortable regardless."

Rosebush: "Uh, what is wrong with your skin?"

Mustard: "I've really had enough of being asked that.
Plumtree: "We were all thinking it."
Mustard: "I bathe in mustard."

Rosebush: "You are disgusting."
Plumtree: "We were all thinking that too."

The Butler: "Hello. Should I do it now? Excellent. Wait until nightfall? Surely."

The Butler: "In the meantime..."

The Butler: "Let's take a nap now."

The Butler: "Wait until nightfall..."

Lemon-Lime: "Lalalalala!"
White: "Shut--"

Lemon-Lime: "The power just want out!"

Mustard: "I hadn't noticed."
*light flickers completely out*



The Butler: "Um, hello? Who's there?"

The Butler: "Who just opened the door?"

The Butler: "Wait, why did this room go dark?"

The Butler: "Hello? Hello?"
?????: "I'm here."
*????? hits The Butler over the head with a lead pipe*

The Butler: "Ow! Why would you do that?"
*?????? hits The Butler again*

The Butler: "Ouch! My head! Stop! I thought, I thought you wouldn't kill me too!"
?????: "Isn't it obvious? You had to die."

The Butler: "No..."
*The Butler dies*

*lights slowly come back on*

Scarlet: "Well, must have just been a power outage."
Brown: "No kidding."

Peach: "The door is no longer locked!!"

Peach: "He's dead! He's dead!"
Green: "Who's dead? Who's missing?"

Gray: "It is the butler!"

Brown: "Oh my God!"
Plumtree: "Oh my God!"
Lemon-Lime: "I guess, for once, the butler didn't do it."